Monday, April 14, 2008

4th Birthday

Today is Seth's 4th Birthday, and his parents (Kristi and Riley) sent me flowers. They do this every year on Seths birthday, and they always send a card with them telling me how much they love and appreciate me and the sacrifice I made. They are just so thoughtful. They always keep me updated on what they are doing and they email me about twice a month! I just keep thinking how grateful I am for them, I really could not have picked a better family to place Seth with. It's been a tough few days for me thinking of all the moments that I have missed, but I'm also happy that he's happy and has such a wonderful family.

I can't belive how fast time can fly. When I placed him I thought that time would just crawl without him...and for a long time it did, and I guess sometimes it still does, but when I look back it seems like just yesterday I was in the hospital and thinking to myself "can I really do this?" In four years my baby has grown into His mom and dads little boy. He is going to start taking T-Ball this summer, and he is already wrighting his letters. He loves to swim, and he loves to play with his brand new little brother. He loves his big sister and they do everything together.'s to Seth. Happy Birthday...I love you.


Annalee Taylor said...

I cried when I read this... I dont think you know how great of a person you have to be to do something as huge as gave this family their life. I know how it feels to wonder about the "what ifs" and "maybes," but my view is from the other side. You are an amazing person, I admire you for your opptimisim and courage, I dont think I could have done what you did. But I am so grateful that there are people like you, who know it is the right thing to do regardless of how hard it is. I think about my baby's birthmom almost everyday, I am sure Seth's parents are the same way, what a huge blessing you are in their life. I hope you always know that.

Holly said...

I was going through some boxes on Friday evening and I found the pictures we took of Seth in the hospital. I also remember the day like it was yesterday! You are A GREAT person for what you did in giving your baby a better life!

mrs. r said...

oh my tears! i am so glad that you found my blog so that i could read this post ...if for no other reason.

thank you so much for your courageous decision to place. thank you. thank you.

i am excited to link to you on my blog as one of my adoption friends. God bless you.

Carlykins said...

I have felt SO alone in this blog world as a birthmother. All the blogs I read and that I am connected to are of AMAZING families that are unable to have children. BREAKS my heart into pieces. I have always wished to find or connect to other bithmothers out there somewhere in this vast world. So to my excited when I was connected through the R house, by the way a women I LOVE,ADORE,CHERISH,and who ROCKS in many ways besides her advocacy for adoption!!! You said so many things of how I too feel. My heart wept as well as my eyes when I read this. It feels contradicting when I do presentations telling these teenagers about adoption, knowing it is the MOST amazing thing in the world yet the GREATEST heartache one could endure. The thought of raising my little girl made my head spin and continues to yet there is this hole in my heart. It feels like an enternity ago that I placed her yet it seems like yesterday. My arms feel empty and long to hold her yet I am greatful that she is taken care of in a way that I am completely unable to on my own. To see you married gives me hope that there is possibly a man out there that will accept this part of me. It feels so scary to share it. Thank you for sharing this. He is adorable. I look forward to following your blog. It feels weird to be a birthmother myself yet when I meet others I admire them in ways that are undescribable. Thank you again.

Jess said...

I found your blog through Mrs. R.
Your post made me cry! I admire the courage you have and the love for Seth and his family. Adoption is an amazing thing.

Tyler & Terrah Harper said...

Ashley -

You are amazing. This post brought tears to my eyes!

It is so good to know that birth mothers feel this way. I know my birth mother hasn't forgotten me; I certainly haven't forgotten her and what she did for me. Your little Seth has so much to be grateful for, and it all starts with you.

Thank you for your sacrifice. :)