this morning i've been reading a few blogs about adoption, one about the feelings of a new "birthmom", another about the feelings and experiences of seasoned adoptive parents, and other adoption stories. i guess after going through adoption this is something that catches my interest. after reading a few of these blogs i felt the need to express some of my own feelings, because some of them have changed since the day (6 years ago) that i placed OUR sweet little seth. and as a warning, this will be a little jumbled because they are just my own random thoughts a feelings.
i love talking about my story. i know people are afraid to ask questions or bring it up for fear of upsetting me....but it doesn't upset. yes i might cry, but it's not because i'm sad...it's just still very emotional. but i love the memories, and i don't mind the questions at all. i think a lot of birthmoms are this way. ask us questions...we would love to tell you about our little miricles.
and last...(because i know this is really long)...i don't, for even one second regret my decision. if i was given the chance to go back and do things differently...i wouldn't...i wouldn't even go back and not get pregnant (is that bad?). seth is an amazing little boy, and this is the way he was brought here....i would not take that back. it was hard and painful and downright gutwrenching for me...but if that is the way he was to come to this earth and be with his family....then i'm happy to be the one to bring him here, and i'm so happy that i get to be a small part of his life. adoption was a gift for me too...not just for seth, and not just for seth's parents and family....i think for everyone involved it was a gift. at least that's how i look at it.
i guess the bottom line is that everyone involved in adoption will have a different opinion depending on the way it went for them. but for me...it went as well as it could have in that situation.